TRY SOMETHING NEW WITHOUT WASTING TIME

People frequently tell us they want to try something new. When we follow up with them, we often find out they haven't even taken the first step. There's a lot of lip service between what people say they want to do, and what they actually do. We have begin to analyze why.

A big and not surprising factor, is that it can come down to jealousy. That's right, jealousy of safeguarding one's time and money! Today, more so than ever before, people want a good return on their investment of time and money. We understand that expectation because we do to! But we also know that people are eager to find new hobbies, interests, passions, whatever...so you do have to expend time, effort and money to find out what you like and don't like. This is where people get stuck. They don't want to spend the money or time on something they might not like---but then again, it could be time and money spent on something they do like. Frustration is an obvious result, as well as feeling frozen, or in limbo, waiting to take that first or next step.

We have a few ideas to share that will help people get unstuck and begin to rewire in a cost-effective way.

For example, if you want to learn something about 19th century art, you can sign up for a 6 week $600 course at a local museum. But what if after the second class you discover it isn't what you wanted to learn. Now that's a problem; you're thinking, money and time wasted. So rather than running the risk of being disappointed and a little poorer, people convince themselves to do nothing. We understand their reluctance because time and money are both precious commodities, especially today.

But wait. How about managing your risk with a free or low cost seminar before you take the plunge? Now there's an opportunity. You would be amazed at the number of free lectures, seminars, classes, and other offers on the internet. Take a look at some of the GROUPON offers...or offers coming through Amazon.com. Some people automatically use them, and others automatically click them off! We say look before you delete! Your future fun could be lost once you hit that delete button!

Museums offer free lectures that are excellent and inspiring. You can meet like minded people interested in the same topic that you are pursuing, or if you are feeling like a hermit, you can learn new and exciting things on -line. How you choose to experience new things is your call...but our point is that there are FREE things to try before you plunk down your hard earned cash. You just have to do some investigation to find one that fits your interest. It's a great way to "try before you buy." These type of offers can get you started on a rewiring path to a new interest or an old one that you want to rekindle.

How do I do it? Just go to your browser and type Free Seminars and your city or town name. Then see what pops up. Usually the local newspaper or magazine has a listing. Do it now---your future is waiting.

Conquering Obstacles for a Fulfilled Future

We've attended several weddings over the past year ,(each one more unique and fabulous than the last!) and at each event we met people who were either close to retirement age (which was defined by them as being between 60-72), or were retired already and wondering what's next? Each man or woman, whether we were sitting and waiting for the ceremony to start, enjoying a glass of champagne or out on the dance floor, yes, even on the dance floor, we were tracked down, and questioned about how do you get it right in your next act? These people were not panicking, but they admittedly were nervous about the future.

The general theme was: "Everybody tells you to save money----ok, we've done it. We know where we want to live; we want to stay right where we are but travel more. But the media makes the future sound easy, but let me tell you I'm no kid and I've discovered that I'm more than a little scared."

We didn't want to turn the wedding into a focus group, so we kiddingly said, "One of the greatest obstacles to rewiring is ourselves.  Everyone needs to get out of their own way."  We put together a list of obstacles that can lead to emotional paralysis. Sometimes by acknowledging our own reality we can overcome these obstacles.  If the obstacle is deep seated enough it may require counseling.  Do any of these apply to you? Either way getting over the obstacle can lead to a fulfilling and joyful future.  Isn't it worth trying!!! 

• Lack of confidence ----self doubt
• Fear of failure and perfectionism
• Procrastination
• Anxiety
• Indecision and indecisiveness
• Depression
• Immobilization 
• Rigidity: unwillingness to compromise or to be flexible
• Aversion to risk taking 
• Impatience
• Lack of motivation  
• Difficulty getting organized and feeling overwhelmed
• Inability to set priorities
• Difficulty tolerating frustration

65 THINGS TO DO WHEN YOU RETIRE: TRAVEL

65 THINGS TO DO WHEN YOU RETIRE: TRAVEL is a new book of travel essays edited by Mark Evan Chimsky. We are delighted to be contributors of a REWIRE! travel essay.  All profits from the book go to fund Cancer research and prevention.  It is a wonderful opportunity to learn about travel and make a contribution to a worthy cause.

Here is what is being said about the book:  "A total of 10,000 people turn 65 each day -- and many of them who retire want to make the most of travel opportunities. 65 Things to Do When You Retire: Travel offers practical, inspiring advice about how to have the time of your life, whether traveling with a group, with a spouse or partner, or on your own. More than 65 intrepid writers and travel experts reveal their own personal adventures and describe glorious getaways for retirees, including such exciting travel opportunities as international house-sitting, going to Italy for a writing workshop, volunteering to help communities in developing countries, doing archaeological digs, taking a retirement "gap year," and chucking it all to see the world. Readers will discover how to plan for their own "great escapes," whether it's a trip to a lodge and spa in Wyoming or to a sacred pilgrimage in France."

The previous book, 65 Things to Do When You Retire, was recently hailed by The Wall Street Journal as "[one] of the year's best guides to later life...Reading the essays in Mark Evan Chimsky's 65 Things to Do When You Retire is like having your own brainstorming session with 65 highly knowledgeable men and women of a certain age and many different walks of life. The collection is full of candor, humor and wisdom."

If you want some great travel insights, get this book.  It's a great read with wonderful thought-starters. If you already know where you want to go, it is a great guide.  If you are not sure where to head, you will get great ideas.  And for the armchair traveler, who never wants to leave home, you will get something to stimulate your imagination. 

Where Stress Evaporates and Time Stands Still

It seems that everyone we speak with acknowledges that they are living in a world of extreme ambiguity and uncertainty. Many boomers are sandwiched between caring for parents and children and grandchildren. The social exhaustion of party politics and the presidential election has people deleting political apps and turning their backs on the media. Even the media is tired of the media. Financial uncertainty, the continuing housing crisis, and endless statistics that blind us are the icing on the cake. A close friend asked us, “What do I do now? Should I just go and hide.” It is a tempting thought, but there is a better way to rise above the fray. Rather than hide, go and REWIRE!

Cast aside stress: If you REWIRE! only one leisure activity in your life, you will begin to see the benefit rather quickly. Leisure at it’s lowest level is a diversion. But don’t settle on distraction. Go to the point in the activity until you find pleasure in it. But don’t just be pleased. Continue to the highest level where the activity provides meaning and purpose as well as pleasure. It is the place where time doesn’t exist. Three hours seems to be three minutes. You will know when you find it, because you will be enjoying challenges, using your skills or acquiring new ones, and you will be connecting to others in a fertile community of activity.  It personifies fulfillment.

We decided to tackle a totally new endeavor---Opera.  No we are not singing, but we are learning, traveling, meeting new people, and importantly using our curiosity to propel us to learn,, marvel, and lust for more. We are fulfilling one of our most important DRIVERS: continuous learning. We kick started it by taking Opera Boot Camp offered by the Metropolitan Opera Guild. It was a commitment of an hour and one half over a period of 4 Saturdays at a very minimal cost. It has begun what we believe is a life long love affair.

It doesn’t have to be opera or any cultural activity. Perhaps it is a sport, or a hobby, or an interest in something that you have always wondered about. Give yourself a gift. Take the time, make the effort, stand back and be wowed by how you feel and what you learn.

REWIRING sure beats the drudgery of daily stress and the ambiguity of life!

Encore: Rewiring for Your Next Act at Kanuga Conference Center

It isn’t often you get to mix planning for the future with Jazz improvisation and the spiritual journey. But that’s just what’s happening on February 25-27th at the Kanuga Conference Center outside of Asheville, NC. The program is Encore: Rewiring for Your Next Act. This event will focus on how to “do” retirement and the future, however you define it. Participants will learn to discover what really motivates and fulfills them as individuals, create a personal vision for the future, and begin to develop a personal “REWIRED life portfolio. There will be an opportunity for some personal coaching as well.

The program is the 2013 Bowen Conference, an annual event to explore Christian commitment.

We are delighted to be joining with the Theodicy Jazz Collective, the Reverend Ben Alford, a recent rewiree, and the Reverend Lisa Flores, Conference Coordinator.  Working with a Jazz group who constantly improvise as they play is a dream-come true for us. We love Jazz and we have seen first hand how retirees benefit when they use improvisation to improve their experiences and enhance their dreams. Attendees will leave with deeper personal insights about themselves and tools they can use to achieve a more fulfilling and enjoyable future.

Kanuga is one of the great conference centers and camps in the nation and is located in a magnificent setting in the mountains of Western North Carolina. It’s been around since 1928 situated on 1400 of the most beautiful acres you can imagine. Lake Kanuga is a photographer’s dream. The facilities of Kanuga are modern and amazing. In addition to the conference individuals can take full advantage of the hiking trails, yoga and other recreational venues located at Kanuga. 

Here is the link to learn more about the Conference and how to register for what will be an exceptionally rewarding and fun experience. The conference is open to everyone regardless of religion or denomination.

STOP GIVING YOURSELF LIP SERVICE!

I had postponed writing a New Year’s blog because I found myself beginning to write some of “the same old, same old.” What I mean is that each year there is the expected dialogue that people have with themselves about making and keeping resolutions. Or perhaps it’s the dialogue about getting committed to changing some things in your life that you have been complaining about forever. Or maybe you truly are sincere when you try to convince yourself that you really have the desire to start anew but just can’t get into gear for whatever reason.

I thought about those dialogues and decided NOT to write about change or resolutions this year. Instead I decided to get right to the point and to tell everyone DO SOMETHING SMALL. YES SMALL! Don’t go for BIG! You won’t get there. You know yourself and you might have proven that to yourself already.

Think about it: We learn to crawl before we walk, and to walk before we run. Yet as grown ups we go for BIG and often make monumental commitments to ourselves, only to falter, or even worse, fail because the commitment or goal just looked too massive. So rather than being down on yourself … GO SMALL. Take a small step.

In fact I challenge you to make some small effort or action today towards a goal you have been thinking about. Then when you’re done, smile and pat yourself on the back. Sounds trite but if you do that every day for one week, you’ll not only feel better about yourself but you’ll be moving forward on some initiative in your life.

Rewiring your life…whether it be at work, play, in the community or in relationships, doesn’t happen overnight. There are books, YOUTUBE videos and podcasts on taking small steps to success, so take them! And HAPPY NEW YEAR!

DON’T MISS OUT ON LIFE BECAUSE OF YOUR EGO!

We recently did a blog on why people don’t try new things and it is often because they are safeguarding their time, effort, energy and money. In our presentations and workshops we are always challenging people to REWIRE®. We help them identify dreams, goals and resources that would lead to a more fulfilling future… at work, at play, in life overall.

Every day we meet men and women over 50 who want to rewire their life by trying something new. That “new” can be learning a sport, a language, doing yoga, even volunteering, but for whatever reason they find excuses not to proceed. We had earlier discovered that they postpone or procrastinate on moving forward because of time, effort, energy and money….and now we add …they are safeguarding their egos…to the list!

We first saw this happening with Boomers who were facing retirement, or even in retirement, and admitted to being bored and “antsy” to try other things, but holding back. Being researchers we probed why this was happening, and discovered that they didn’t want to be a beginner. They didn’t want to look stupid in front of others as they tried something new.


Many of these men and women had been highly successful in their work, and didn’t want to be in positions where they would appear vulnerable, and not able to compete at peak performance.


One man lamented that he could kick himself now for not having taken up golf years ago, now at 64 his friends played a pretty good game, and he didn’t. He told us he didn’t like to play with them, because they ribbed him about how bad he was and he hated it!

In our experience there is no possible way to go from being a beginner to an expert, or even just proficient in something, without starting out as a novice!

We all have to make some hard choices: Will our ego permit us to be a beginner, or will our self perception hold us back from new experiences? The answer is up to us but here are a few very basic tips to ponder:

1. Look into taking a private lesson or two to jumpstart your new activity.

2. Supplement your classes with books, videos and apps.

3. Don’t be a “quick quitter!”

4. Believe in the adage: “Practice Makes Permanent.”

5. Your brain has great “plasticity;” challenge and use your gray matter.

Don’t let your ego hold you back form a great future. Go out and BEGIN!